Women and apples

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. The men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.
So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, THEY'RE amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree.

25 reasons to lose weight(for girls only)

1. Not to compare yourself with slim and beautiful girls.
2. To squeeze into the most beautiful summer dress.
3. To feel confident in a swimming suit.
4. To wear skinny jeans and look great.
5. Walking around the shops will stop to be a torture:everything will suit you.
6. To wear not what make you look slim,but what you like.
7. Girls will be staring at you with envy - just like you when you were fat.
8. To come back to school from a summer vacation and see everyone only gained weight.
9. To be energetic.
10. To see finally this gap between the thighs.
11. Just to know that you are able to achieve what seemed to be unachievable.
12. Not to breathe hard after the first kilometer jogging.
13. To be healthy.
14. To look confident and sexy in a tight dress.
15. To ask in some shop "Do you have the same, but the size S?»
16. To look in the mirror and be happy with what you see there.
17. To wear whatever you want.
18. To proudly pose infront of the cameras without hiding anything.
19. To stop dreaming and start living.
20. Not to be someone's "fat friend".
21. To safely call your weight out loud.
22. To become an inspiration for someone else.
23. To have your own photos "before" and "after."
24. To have your own inspiring story of how you managed to lose the weight.
25. For others to take you up and not cave in under your weight.

50 things everyone should do at least once in his life

1. Travel around the world.
2. A parachute jumping.
3. Fall in love.
4.Dive to the remnants of a sunken ship.
5. Try casting for the movies or on the television.
6. Make a great party with lots of people
7. Make a photo shoot.
8. Learn how to play a musical instrument
9. To live in another country for at least a year.
10. Spend few weeks relaxing on the beach with your love.
11. Learn a foreign language.
12. Read at least 30 books.
13. Jump off a cliff into the water.
14. Cook a fish which you caught.
15. Ride a horse.
16. Spend the night walking around the city.
17. Make a three-week road trip across the country with three best friends.
18. Ride a camel across the desert.
19. Rafting on the river.
20. To gain a good physical shape.
21. To understand the scheme of the government in your country.
22. Learn some form of a dance.
23. Kiss in an unusual place.
24. Write a book, even if it is short and will never be published.
25. Visit a third world country.
26. Swim in the sea at midnight.
27. Take a shower under a waterfall.
28. Select your goals in life and write them down(and reach)
29. Celebrate a New Year's Eve in the town`s main square.
30. Go on a blind date.
31. Sleep under the stars.
32. Visit the Holi feast in India.
33. Visit Carnival in Rio de Janeiro.
34. Spend some time as a savage.
35. Fly a balloon.
36. Rent a fast sports car and drive on the freeway.
37. Change jobs until you find what you need.
38. Buy a house
39. See the Grand Canyon.
40. Visit an important football match.
41. Spend a day at home with your love.
42. Make a speech standing infront of a large audience.
43. Make a shot from a gun.
44. Learn the basics of some martial art.
45. Go into the jungle.
46. Learn the trick.
47. Get an education.
48.Get married.
49.Safe some money and spend the whole day shopping without thinking about the price.
50.Feel you are happy.

The problem of a fat-ass syndrome in a woman's life

According to the magazines and British scientists one of the first places in the list of global problems is PMS. This popular syndrome has been a subject of lots of scientific researches, and an immortal excuse for undercooked sausages and domestic homicide. But what you read below, should turn your vision of the world around. A terrible secret, which will be disclosed by me (and even if for this betrayal I'll have to wander forever in the lower circle of Hell with undercooked sausage in my pocket), it has to be finally emerged.
The name of this mystery is women`s syndrome of a fat-ass. I hear the sound of falling into a swoon ladies' bodies, who were not expecting me to say it.
Lay-offs, divorces, self-mutilation and refusal from sex - is just a small top of those troubles, which for a long time are looking for explanations in the courts, board meetings and family councils. And usually there is one explonation-the fat ass syndrome. This is when everything seems to be wrong, and the life isn`t the cheerfull, because you have a fat ass. Perhaps you think that this disease have much in common with the above PMS. You are mistaken. Take, then, that in contrast to PMS, during which most things are often limited to two-three days, fat-ass syndrome can occur in women many times per a month. And the duration of each incident varies from one hour to several months or even years. Cases that go less than a week, I`ll call fat-ass seizures. The rest will be a protracted fat-ass syndrom. It is important that this syndrom is contagious and is transmitted not only through personal contact, but also by the phone and by Skype.
Another significant difference lies in the fact that women are proud of premenstrual syndrome. PMS is a flag and a horn of the feminine. They can justify anything with the help of it. Another thing is a fat-ass syndrome. A rare woman admits that she was the victim of a terrible disease. Most of the keep their terrible secret, taking it with them into the grave.
I'll try to explain,my dear readers, what is, in fact, a fat-ass syndrome.
I won`t lie if I say that  90% of women suffer from this illness in a civilized part of our round planet Earth. It is important to understand that there is no connection between real physical feminine body. Fat-ass syndrome is a state of mind. So this syndrome can have women in the weight range of 40 to 150 kg.
How does it happen?
The woman lives her normal life, no one touches her, and then - BOOM! There comes a seizure of a fat-ass syndrome. Not by itself, of course. Always there is some objective reason. For example, it is possible to watch TV and then notice Megan Fox. Woman begins thinking something like, "That's what is beautiful and sexy, and I'm not like this" - and that`s it.Fat-ass syndrome begins.
Mass fat-ass syndrome epidemia can be seen in the first decade of the month, when newspaper publisher prints the new portion of a glossy production, stuffed with pictures of perfect beauties.
Fat-ass syndrom can be even caused by jeans that got smaller after washing.
There are a lot of reasons,as u could notice.
You might ask me how to check if a woman has this syndrome? It is not that difficult. After all, the main occupation of women during fat-ass syndrome is - fighting against this "fat-ass". 
And here they are, some signs of this righteous struggle.
1. The first thing that a woman does during fat-ass syndrome - she stops eating. It happens suddenly: a girl could devour fried potatoes, and then suddenly remembered that her son asked for some help with the hw,where they had to read stories of Tolstoy. Tolstoy!(Editor`s note-Tolstiy means fat in Russian), and then - unchewed potato get stuck in her mouth. Nothing-absorbing woman is a vivid indication that a syndrome occurred recently and lasts no longer than 24 hours. That's how much you can really eat nothing. After the "critical days" young lady, usually catches up with the next stage, which is described below.
2. Salad. It is proved that if a woman in all restaurants and cafes begins ordering only salad - it means she has the fat-ass syndrome. Nothing else can explain this love of a woman to a mixture of cucumbers, tomatoes and other vegetable stuff. Moreover, apart from a rather dubious taste, a woman gets also enjoyment in the form of strength training will. It`s very difficult to order a salad,while others ordered pasta, pancakes with red fish and apple strudel.
3. The woman goes and buys some sports clothing or equipment! Buying snickers,a rope, spread it all out on the bed (you can not even wear it!) -is a very good way to get rid of a fat-ass syndrome. Immediately you start to feel like a sport, and easy lady. And a seizure disappear. So stopping the woman in this case is not necessary. Unless, of course, this is not the eighth sports kit of all the basic necessities for the last two months.
4. "Do not you think that I gained weight?" - asks the girl casually, like the answer to this question it is not very important. Be careful - this is the tip of the iceberg. Before a woman asks a man  this kind of question about a month should pass before she really does it. She analyzes everything-if it is worth asking,trying to think about the results of an answer. The desire to ask it  already appears when you have a fat-ass syndrome on a last stages of growing. No salad and Adidas can help you already. If a woman is valuable to you as a friend, mother, lover or wife - your answer should be perfectly consistent with her expectations. Exactly expectations. As I mentioned above, fat-ass syndrome is a mental illness, so do not try to send her to the sport club, or exhort about a diet. It helps when a woman really has the problem with being overweight. And in this case it`s a great time to think about the soul, not the ass.
5. Despite the fact that all women love to buy clothes, it becomes very, very unpleasant procedure, when she has a fat-ass syndrome. Let's just say I`ll never go fit anything during the fat-ass seizure. A dressing room in the shop is  a provocateur of a disease itself,actually. This is, of course, very stupid not to know your size, but I do not know, though regularly buy clothes. I only know that I have a shoe size 37. But M, XXS, 42, 28 for pants, "add 10 to our" - I do not understand anything about it. This is why I always call for a consultant,so he can at least answer on the question like  "our 46 - this is your what?". From time to time consultant gets an idea not only to talk to me about how to "add to our 10", but simply to find something to fit me. And here just happens a strategic mistake. By the way, they make this mistake very often. It feels like a boutique workers think they will make me happy if on my "more than forty-sixth size" they`ll steady advise me to buy something from 42. Well, when they tell me this, I'll definitely be pleased. And all happy will go into the fitting. But there a bitter disappointment comes to me as soon as I`ll try on 42-sized trousers. The mirror will immediately show a pig in bra, with panties stuck on the ass. A dead pig,actually,if to take into account the delicate white - blue light in a fitting room. Agree, you must have an extensive training mind to find clothes, try on, and be content to purchase. I had a seizure of a fat-ass right in the dressing room, and I quietly left it without buying anything.
***
It seems I've written quite a lot of letters and words, which were designed to show you,the honorable reader, that the issue of women's mental suffering from a fat-ass syndrome is comprehensive. It affects every aspect of our personal and public life, requiring new non-trivial way to solve it.
And therefore, be vigilant.

Ed Sheeran

This is my favourite artist.He writes all the lyrics himself and has amazing voice,which makes me tremble.

Why do we need religion in our life?

Lots of times we all have heard the question like:Do you believe in God?
I always answer I don`t believe in God like in one man,who looks on us from the sky and controls everything.But ofc I do believe there is something.I believe in some destiny,karma and some magic,which happens in the world.I`m not atheist. But let`s just say I`m agnostic. I don`t know if God exists,but also don`t know if he doesn`t. But we all do believe in something.We need to believe in order not to break down and commit a suicide everytime we have some hard moments in life to come through.Only faith in something gives us hope,that even when we are going through the hard moment in our life,when we don`t have anyone to help us we hope,we pray for someone to help us.Even the one who doesn`t believe will still ask for some help.We need to move and without hope we would lose the aim of living.
At least,it`s my point of view.And I would like to prove it with one nice story...

"One person got lost in the woods. Somewhere around the taiga. There are no guidelines. And then he saw a man and wondered how to get out of the forest. The man looked at him and said that there was only the forest around and nothing else.No exit.That wherever he went there would be no way out. He offered him to lodge with him in the woods. The lost man got into a despair. There is no way out, it makes no sense. And then he saw another man.He rushes to him with begging to help him to get out of the forest. The other man began explaining him where to go and gave direction. If you were on the side of a lost man, then who would you believe? Even considering that the second man can be wrong you will have to listen to the second one, because the first does not offer anything at all."
That's how we make choices. Religion offers a way out, a real solution, but perhaps you`ll have to make a lot of effort and a long walk. But first, an atheistic way, does not propose anything. Only death in the end, which will destroy everything. First and foremost, will deprive the meaning of life.

Something about motivation...

The most goal-oriented person - is the one who really wants to use a toilet. All the problems seem to be insignificant. Agree, it is ridiculous to hear phrases like:
I've pissed my pants because:
- Didn`t have time to go to the toilet.
- I was too tired.
- Lost hope. I didn`t believe I could reach it.
- I'm too stupid to do it.
- I have already pissed before. I never will reach it.
- This is clearly not for me.
- I knocked, but it wasn`t opened.
- I was depressed.
- I had no money, I couldn`t afford it!
- I decided to go there tomorrow...
And how often do you go to the goal, like you are running to the toilet?

How to become a good husband

I present you 10 short tips on how to become a good husband to his wife:
1. Become a real man first of all and then get married. Be sure that you both are ready for a solid life together.
2. Learn how to truly love your wife. The word "love" is not limited only with sexual relations. Love is the feeling when you can sacrifice with something for someone you love, and when you don`t require, but you give absolutely unselfish! Love - is a forgive!And make her sure she is the only one for you!Be interested in her.Ask her how her day was,learn how to listen.
3. Give gifts and flowers not only on holidays! Plan your vacation together and also dream with each other!Tell her compliemnts NOT ONLY when she puts on some make up or a new dress.
4. Have the sacrificial concern for the welfare of the family in all aspects - spiritual, physical, material and others.
5. You should take an active part in the upbringing of your children. You need to be a good father!
6. Be kind and compassionate!
7. You must learn how to deal with your body desires towards other women! After all, even a loving husband might react to a beautiful woman.But you shouldn`t follow and  resist the impulses of your body.
8. A good husband will not be rude to his wife. He will treat her like a princess.
9. Earn the trust of the family, "conquer the hearts"with the deeds and not just empty promises.
10.Be honest and open with your wife. Always talk about what bothers you and dream together.

Women`s revenge

- If a man scattered his socks around the room, then pour the whole bowl of the soup in the kitchen.
- If he turns away after sex and snoring - start snoring during sex.
- If a man does not like your stupid and terrible girlfriend, then start having beautiful, intelligent and wealthy boyfriends.
- If a man does not like your job - be a stripper. He will understand he was wrong.
- If a man does not get up off the couch - do not get out of the closet. Let's see, who quickly breaks down.
- If a man is not helping you in the kitchen - do not help him in his bed.
- If a man refuses to wash the dishes, everything is simple - feed him with apples.
- If a man raised his hand on you, make so he will spend all his nights and days alone with this hand from that moment.
- If a man bought a summer tire and not an evening dress which you liked - go to a party in the summer tires.
- If a man refuses to go to the balcony to smoke and smokes in bed - make his bed on the balcony.
- If a man forgets to fix the bathroom faucet - make a role-playing game with him first, where he is a plumber. And when he repairs the valve, give him some money and go to sleep.
- If a man calls you as a log in bed - tell him,that he is a woodpecker and should begin looking for another hollow.
- If a man does not remove the socks during sex - do not remove the stockings during sex.
- If a man accuse you that you are simulating an orgasm - do not pretend then. Let him try!

Men as...

1)a cup of coffee...the best one is hot, strong and do not let you sleep the whole night;
2)an advertisement...you can not trust any of it`s words;
3)computers...they are difficult to understand and they always have problems with memory;
4)snow...you do not know when it`s going to come, how many inches will be and how long it will last;
5)a microwave oven...warm up for 15 seconds;
6)weather...you can`t change it,but can prodict what it will be like;
7)lawyers...when they are charged, they will always find a justification for themselve;
8)a newborn...first they were funny, but then you have hard time to clean up after them;
9)a dog...if he took you for a walk - this is just to drag you into the bushes;
10)a diploma...it takes time to get it, but then you do not know what to do with it;
11)a tile...if it is properly laid in the first time, you can walk on it all your life;
12)a chocolate...you get fat from both of them,just from the men for 9 months only;
13)a remote control...both are lying somewhere near the TV;
14)a bus...you are always waiting for the right one,but comes only the one you don`t actually need;